My weekend happened to be low-key. Saturday Stewie and I hung out until Amy showed up in the evening. Amy and I decided to go get some dinner and I pointed out porn stars and explained the hanky code to her. While eating a man sat down behind Amy and pulled out three new porn DVDs. I pointed this out to Amy and she did the best, sly-stretch-look-over-the-shoulder number I’ve seen in years. She said, “I wonder what he’s going to be doing tonight?” “You do realize that he’s taking out his right hand for a romantic dinner.” Then I took my hand and formed a fist and placed it by Amy, “I don’t want pasta, I want your little cock!” She died laughing. Her funeral is on Wednesday.