[Real Life] Christmas

I jumped into a taxi on Christmas around 6 PM. I was off to see Monica, we had plans to get Chinese food and then just hang out. I told the cabbie I need to go to Bush at Hyde. He zoomed off, speeding through San Francisco, weaving in and out of the lanes of traffic. “Now I know how Princess Diana must have felt before she died,” I told the driver. He laughed, “We won’t be going through any tunnels.” Upon arriving in front of Monica’s building, I tipped the driver generously. He had gotten me there in one piece and in remarkable time, plus it was Christmas. Not being one who likes Christmas, it was still nice to see that Monica’s building was decorated with all the trimmings. After she buzzed me up and we exchanged little gifts, we were off to Polk Street. We made it to Bamboo during the dinner rush, but were seated promptly. We kvelled over our service and food, not so much because it was great but because it was just what we wanted—very “A Christmas Story” sans the “fa-ra-ra-ra-ra’s”. After dinner, not much was open but bars. We walked down Polk to Ghirardelli Square. Monica bought some tampons for a ridiculous price, $8 for 10 and I bought a pack of Vanilla Mint gum for $1.25. Ah, tourist traps and their prices. This woman walked into the store and knocked over a pair of sunglasses. “You knocked those over,” she said to Monica. Monica looked at her and said surprisingly, “I did?” “Yeah, I’ve been standing over here,” she lied as she had just walked past the sunglass rack. “Oh, well that doesn’t mean you couldn’t pick them up” Monica began in a motherly tone which turned sarcastic “but that’s OK.” We proceeded to make fun of her for a couple of blocks. Oh we’re going to hell. We walked to Pier 39, got some hot beverages and treats from Blue Chip cookies and found a place to sit and talk the night away. We stared out in to the bay, at boats with festive lights, one of which had made a Christmas tree design using its masts, complete with a star at the top. When we were finally ready to go home we walked over to catch a cable car. A homeless man tried to get us to donate money in order to help find a missing girl. He showed us a flier he had picked up. I had to give him credit for his creativity, but he wasn’t getting any of my coin. He jumped on the cable car with us, all of us getting to ride for free. The cable car operators were the best I had ever been around, they weren’t rude! Everyone wished us a Merry Christmas as we jumped off on Taylor and walked toward Grace Cathedral. The neighborhood was quiet and enchanting. Soon enough we were back where we started, at Monica’s. I bid her good night and headed back to the Lower Haight.

[Real Life] Christmas Ball Sacks

Scott and I met up underground at the Castro Street Station. We rode the L down to Civic center station and made our way to Aunt Charlie's. Scott ordered us up some Pabst Blue Ribbon at $2.50 a can. Ah, white trash holidays, just like at home! The drag queens that preformed were nothing like you'd see at Trannyshack, where performances can be like theater. These were old school drag queens, the kind you know have lived the hardest life possible, putting it all on display in gowns of glitter. A few have fake breasts and cheek implants. I have it on good word that their "bits" are still intact. The tranny hunters were out in force. I couldn't tell if they were more tragic than the queens. Eager to give a "lady" a tip, buy "her" a drink and perhaps have a rendezvous later on. I can't image what would happen. It wouldn't be pretty. Scott is really well known, so all the "girls" played to us, especially Gina LaDivina "the $65,000 Silicone Wonder." She calls him one of her kids. She has "Two girls and eight boys." After the show we went walked through the Tenderloin. A black man with an eye-patch wished us a "Merry Christmas." We saw three police cars pull up to an apartment building, one officer hand cuffed the gate open and all six officers went inside. Merry Christmas indeed. When we got to Polk street, we headed north. Grubstake on pine was our destination. Tranny hookers were working the street. Kevin and Scott would call out to them and we'd all laugh. By the time we got to Grubstake we found it closed. We turned around and headed back down to Polk and to this dive pizza restaurant. We ordered up slices. Two mushroom and one cheese. The place was pretty packed, since it was small. While waiting for our slices we noticed one of the cooks slip off his sneaker and scratched the bottom of his sock. We laughed and laughed. I knew my slice was going to taste extra cheesy. I checked the bottom of the slice for planter warts. We made fun of some girls that came in. One tranny hooker kept walking by the window. She wore a jean mini skirt which didn't cover her ass, a denim jacket with a hot pink blouse and hot pink stilettos. Kevin commented, "She's obviously dressed for winter." Scott retorted, "She's a figure skater looking for some "ice'". Finally, at 2 AM we got a cab and drove home. Another Christmas Eve for the books.

[AVFMC] St. Ignatius

[AVFMC] Peace

[Real Life] How to Kill a Mockingbird

If you're writer or lit-centric, if you are or have been a teacher, you'll love this link: How to Kill a Mockingbird. I'm glad educational institutions bring together great minds to create this kind of art!

[AVFMC] Hang Girl

[AVFMC] Buena Vista Park View

Jim and I took the dogs out for a stroll in Buena Vista Park, where we all enjoyed the view.

[AVFMC] Sleep Sheep

[Real Life] Evocative Pulp Paintings by Lisa Bostwick

Occasionally I come across a painter whose work inspires me to pick up a brush again. While visiting a friend at Citizen Cupcake in the Virgin Megastore downtown, I saw a series of evocative Pulp Paintings by Lisa Bostwick. If you're downtown, do check them out.

[AVFMC] I Smell a Rat

A Sewer Rat! But it looks more like a Long Nosed Bandicoot.

[Fortune Cookie]

Your business will assume vast proportions.