[AVFMC] Defend Falluja

[Real Life] North Beach Brawl, Well Almost

After leaving my casa this morning I went to Yerba Buena plaza and chilled for awhile. Talked with my sister, Monica and Nick-- making plans with him to go see "Bride & Prejudice" at 2:30. It was overcast-- less than desirable weather for some, but I kind of like it that way.

After YB Plaza, I walked around town and until I found an issue of The Guardian. I read it for the first time cover to cover. Nick showed up and we watched the movie-- which was cute and lame.

Afterward we went to North Beach. Approaching a corner up the street from Clown Alley on Columbus, this derelict was yelling at this Asian woman driving a minivan. He called her a "gook" and told her to go back to her own country. Nick and I cross to the side of the street where this vagrant was.

Nick was wearing a Paul Frank sweatshirt with Julius the monkey on the front. The drunkard said, "Hey Curious George-- do you have twenty-five cents?"

Nick replied with a firm, "No."

That set the guy off, he started rambling about everything he could possibly ramble about. A woman with an Irish Wolf hound walked buy and he said, "That's an Afghani Hound. I had three houses filled with those dogs. Do you know what an Afghani Hound is?" He was in my face, his breath was hot and smelt of cheap booze and gym socks. "Do you have twenty-five cents?"

"No," I said looking towards the traffic lights hoping they would change.

"You don't have twenty-five cents!" he was belligerent.

"You need to stop talking to us," I said my adrenaline rising. I bent the fingers on my right hand in case I need to swiftly break this guys nose.

"Fuck you!" he yelled as the light turned.

"Fuck you," I said back stepping off the curb. "Do us a favor and jump into oncoming traffic."

We made it across the street and rounded a corner. We stopped into a patisserie. After two minutes who should happen to walk in? The chronically inebriated vagabond. Nick and I ordered our pastries. The ass started talking to some man who was behind us, complaining about not eating and needing to be fed. Then he mubbled something about Nick and myself. While we were paying the liquored scrounged left.

He cross the street flipping off people who wouldn't roll down their windows and give him money. As Nick and I jay walked across the same street, he turned and opened his mouth real big as if to yell but just flipped us off.

I was happy we didn't get into a North Beach brawl. However it seems every time I'm down in that area there's some drunken asshole that tries to ruin my time there. The last time I was with Monica some psycho started yelling at us on the bus and told us to go back to Las Vegas. He tried to ambush us after we got off and I went to whack him with my umbrella when he ran off.

I should probably take my notepad down there and just hang out and write-- but I'd probably end up with a trip to the ED at the nearest hospital.

[Real Life] Religious Rumble

Just minutes before this picture was snapped, two Mormon Elders and three of Jehovah's Witnesses got into a rumble-- seems both had staked this part of the block as their turf. The clouds above them opened up and I swear, God smote them all, leaving just their shoes, clothes and some pink Watchtower pamphlets on the ground.

[AVFMC] Una

[AVFMC] Fist on Fuego

Some how this makes me think of a handballer advert for hemoroids.

[Overheard] Martha's Trump

Seems like Martha Stewart has a new venture, she's going to star in her own reality TV series on NBC. "The Apprentice: Martha Stewart". I'm sure it will be a good thing.

[Real Life] Are you Relationship-Ready?

You're Cool as a Cucumber You're not so sure about this whole commitment thing, are you? Chances are you're sowing some wild oats and aren't too concerned about the harvest. That's OK for now -- just don't hold out for perfection. You don't seem meant to live your life alone, so make sure you're ready to let someone in when the right one comes along. Are you relationship-ready? Find out now!

[Overheard] Call On Me

This is why I no longer have a digital video recorder, because I would make movies like this and nothing else. Well worth downloading "Call On Me" for a laugh.